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Collection

The Tip Jar

Online begging, itemised and worn.

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BUY ME A COFFEE. I’LL DRINK IT AT YOU.
BUY ME A COFFEE. I’LL DRINK IT AT YOU.
Gratitude, performed at the donor.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
TIP ME. I SAID PLEASE IN ADVANCE.
TIP ME. I SAID PLEASE IN ADVANCE.
Politeness, pre-paid.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
EYE CONTACT UNLOCKS AT $4.99/MO
EYE CONTACT UNLOCKS AT $4.99/MO
The base tier of being acknowledged.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
MY LOVE LANGUAGE IS RECURRING BILLING
MY LOVE LANGUAGE IS RECURRING BILLING
Affection, on auto-renew.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
WE CAN’T BE FRIENDS UNTIL YOU CLEAR MY WISHLIST
WE CAN’T BE FRIENDS UNTIL YOU CLEAR MY WISHLIST
Friendship, with a delivery address.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
YOUR FREE TRIAL OF MY ATTENTION HAS EXPIRED
YOUR FREE TRIAL OF MY ATTENTION HAS EXPIRED
Upgrade to continue being noticed.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
I AM THE LINK IN BIO
I AM THE LINK IN BIO
Not a person with links. The link, ambulatory.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
THIS SHIRT IS MY FUNNEL. YOU ARE IN IT.
THIS SHIRT IS MY FUNNEL. YOU ARE IN IT.
You entered at the top. There is no bottom.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
STANDING NEAR ME SUBSCRIBES YOU TO MY NEWSLETTER
STANDING NEAR ME SUBSCRIBES YOU TO MY NEWSLETTER
Proximity is consent, per our terms.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
RENT: 62% FUNDED. STRETCH GOAL: GROCERIES.
RENT: 62% FUNDED. STRETCH GOAL: GROCERIES.
A life, rendered as a progress bar.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, AND VALIDATE ME
LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, AND VALIDATE ME
The three asks, in ascending desperation.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
SUBSCRIBE TO MY PERSONALITY. CANCEL ANYTIME. YOU WON’T.
SUBSCRIBE TO MY PERSONALITY. CANCEL ANYTIME. YOU WON’T.
Confidence, or the retention data behind it.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
MY BODY IS 100% AD INVENTORY
MY BODY IS 100% AD INVENTORY
Sponsorship enquiries to the usual code.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
MY BODY IS MY ASSET
MY BODY IS MY ASSET
Depreciating, per the schedule, and pledged as collateral regardless.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
YOU’RE MY FAVORITE SPONSOR
YOU’RE MY FAVORITE SPONSOR
Said to each of them, in identical private messages.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
AFFECTION BILLED IN 15-MINUTE INCREMENTS
AFFECTION BILLED IN 15-MINUTE INCREMENTS
Consultation rates apply to feelings.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
TERMS OF FRIENDSHIP APPLY
TERMS OF FRIENDSHIP APPLY
You agreed by continuing to know me.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
CASTING MY NEXT RELATIONSHIP. CONTENT REQUIRED.
CASTING MY NEXT RELATIONSHIP. CONTENT REQUIRED.
Applicants pre-screened for engagement, not compatibility.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
PARTNER WANTED. MUST SIGN A RELEASE.
PARTNER WANTED. MUST SIGN A RELEASE.
Love, pending the paperwork that makes it usable.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
PRE-SELECTED. NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS.
PRE-SELECTED. NOW ACCEPTING APPLICATIONS.
The casting notice for a life presented as a couple.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
MY RELATIONSHIP IS A CONTENT JOINT VENTURE
MY RELATIONSHIP IS A CONTENT JOINT VENTURE
Two people, one media kit.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
SCAN TO BE MY FRIEND
The lowest-friction relationship ever offered.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
THIS QR LEADS TO ANOTHER QR
It is codes all the way down. So are you.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
JOIN MY TELEGRAM. IT’S JUST ME BEGGING.
Honest advertising, for once.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
MY WISHLIST. YOU KNOW WHAT TO DO.
You do. Everyone does.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
buymecoffee/<user_id> · FRIENDSHIP TIER $3
Your own link, your own tier. Issued edition.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
MY RENT IS DUE
The code is not the joke. The shirt is. Both are due.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order
tracked edition
SCAN FOR MY WALLET. WAVING IS FREE. NOTHING ELSE IS.
A complete price list, worn.
Sticker $4 · Tee $24+ Order